04/01/2025
Making the realisation that the crux of a peaceful life is to choose people who choose you and knowing that you won’t need the reassurance because you will feel it.
We get so consumed by the ideas of people in our lives that we neglect the reality of them.
“Maybe if I show them how I want to be treated they’ll treat me better” when in essence you should be able to let people show you in their own way so you can make a decision on whether that resonates with you or not.
You also can communicate your expectations, but you still need to afford people the opportunity to be themselves and realise that they have a right to not be a version that you want.
This is not limited to romantic relationships-it includes friendships and family relations.
There’s a grey area between treating people how you want to be treated and treating them how they treat you that can become blurred and you quickly slip into people pleasing because you become desperate to be treated in a way you like that you go over and above for people hoping they would return the favour and end up getting disappointed.
Our biggest challenge is not wanting to see situations for what they are because we’ve held on to the idea of what they could become and that idea then becomes the “comfort zone”. You have to be able to be present in the discomfort of people not choosing you, otherwise you will constantly find yourself in a position of being hurt and somewhat rejected.
Manage your expectation in the New Year 🎆🎇🌙
