06/23/2026
by Skip Heitzig | Tuesday, June 23, 2026
Complaining is an unhealthy lifestyle. An article in Psychology Today reported: “Complaining drains life of pleasure and compromises your capacity to feel joy.”
More than that, a complaining Christian is a poor witness for Christianity because unbelievers are observing our lives and listening to us. They're wondering what compelling reason we can offer them to leave their darkness and come into our light. And if they hear complaints pouring from us, they're less likely to want to join us.
Complaining always makes things worse because it reinforces negativity. Dr. Travis Bradberry wrote, “Complaining rewires your brain to make future complaining more likely.” He went on to say complaining makes it less likely to experience positive emotions.
All of this is confirmed in Scripture. James wrote, “Do not grumble against one another, brethren, lest you be condemned. Behold, the Judge is standing at the door!” (5:9).
So ask yourself: Am I a complainer? Am I quick to see problems and quick to share what I see? If you can't wait to find somebody to gripe with, you ought to know that's sinful behavior.
Nehemiah 5 points to one of the most important principles in all of Scripture. If you haven't learned this yet, you need to learn it now. It's called the fear of God (see vv. 9 and 15).
Most people don't like talking about the fear of God—they would rather talk about the love of God. But the fear of God, Solomon said, “is the beginning of wisdom” (see Proverbs 9:10).
What is “the fear of the Lord?” It simply means respect, reverence, honor, and love. It is the word used in Leviticus when it says a child should revere his father and mother (see Leviticus 19:3). You could translate fear and revere as the same.
The best definition I can come up with based on Scripture is this: It’s a reverential awe which produces humble submission to a loving God. The only dread, fear, or fright in the equation is that we’re afraid of displeasing the God we love. Just that.
Oswald Chambers wrote this: "The remarkable thing about fearing God is that when you fear God, you fear nothing else. Whereas if you do not fear God, you fear everything else."
The fear of God is the solution to complaining and selfish living, when your vertical relationship governs your horizontal relationships.
So, again, ask yourself this: Is complaining my default mode? If so, sadly, you're in good company. The children of Israel were expert complainers in the wilderness. They complained about everything. “Now the people complained about their hardships in the hearing of the Lord, and when he heard them his anger was aroused” (Numbers 11:1, NIV).
Why is complaining, as a child of God, such a big deal that He would become angry? Because when you complain, it's insulting to Him. You're basically saying, “God, You are not taking care of me.”
David said, “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want” (Psalms 23:1). In other words, God is in control. I don't need a thing.
It's a grateful heart. A complaining sheep is a disgrace to his shepherd. He's saying, “My shepherd doesn't give me what I need.”
Listen, life is tough. Yes, we’ll go through times when we voice what we don't like about a number of situations. But we want to be known for our gratitude, not our complaining. Your Shepherd is still in control of your life.
Your Shepherd still knows what you need. And you might need a period of suffering to humble you. So just leave it there and say, “The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want.”
In His strong love,
Skip Heitzig | Connect with Skip Heitzig
