02/14/2023
I think about my childhood a lot. I didn’t know that gender affirming care was possible; the words were hidden from my access to vocabulary.
I know how happy I am now, as Jordan. It seems mundane to be excited about being happy. The truth is that I didn’t know that happiness could just happen like every other emotion.
I used to cultivate it. Constant upbeat songs to keep the tempo expected of me. It was exhausting. Now, I just am, whatever emotion that may be.
I’m happy as Jordan without having to work at it. Gender affirming care opened up an entirely new outlook on life. I can finally see the future; past exhaustion of looking for words; now behind me.
Just as I’m becoming me, those new words to allow me to be Jordan are at risk of erasure, again and again and again.
I read a quote this weekend at the installation. A 7th grade student from Bradenton, FL wrote “What in your life is hurting you so much that you have to hurt others?”
Gender affirming care is life-saving care. I’ve been fortunate and I’ve also been in severely dark places. I’ve know that I was Jordan for as long as I can remember.
It shouldn’t take 36 years to find courage and access to be authentically yourself. Observation leaves is blind, stories tell truth. Words are necessary to describe existence. Medical care is a human right.
Kids know more about themselves than constructs have had time to align them into sameness and self-denial. It’s time we listen to the wisdom of the youth and believe their existence because it’s real.
***r
