Alchemy Obscura

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110 Lisbon Street
Lewiston, ME
04240

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Bastard Greenheart’s Alchemy Obscura!

-Greetings, welcome, one and all. I stand before you now not as physician , surgeon or practitioner of the medicinal arts. Not as an herbalist, spiritualist, physicist or alchemist, but as a witness. Witness to a phenomena for which all intents and purposes has been ruled by scientist and mystic alike as an impossibility. An Impossibility I present to you today... Behold! Alchemy Obscura! Ambrosia to the greeks. Amrita to the Hindus. Dutsi in Tibet. Ponce De Leon’s fountain, the elixir of life, a tonic, like, no, other. A mysterious compound discovered while beset in the furthest reaches of the orient. Lost at the very edge of the known world, I stumbled upon a small, ancient village, never before beheld by western eyes. I fainted at a shaman’s door, afflicted by a strange and wondrous illness. I slept for 30 days and 30 nights, fevered and sure to death’s threshold if not for this miraculous curative. Alchemy Obscura! Rejuvenates, invigorates, revives and purifies. Cures consumption, constipation, cough, cold, coagulation. Removes stains and phantom pains, headaches, backaches, and witch’s crane. The lame will throw away their crutches, restored to a state of perfect health. Alchemy Obscura my friends, heals any and all afflictions of the lungs, throat stomach, kidneys, liver, heart and mind. If one forgets that sense is lost, Alchemy Obscura will find! Step right up, for Alchemy Obscura! Calms, cures, refreshes, restores! A single bottle will give, and last a lifetime!