08/11/2026
I have a child who comes home from school dysregulated more days than not. She’s the best kind of human and I adore her!She works incredibly hard to meet every expectation ~ at school. She can be a perfectionist, she is a justice driven rule follower, and the child who holds it together all day. And pretty much once she crosses the schools threshold she’s like, “LET IT GO, LET IT GOOOOOOOOOOOO.”
And even with my background as a pediatric COTA, I struggle with it… by the end of the day, I’m almost always dysregulated as well. I tend to get overstimulated easily. I lose my patience. If I try something that doesn’t help, I get frustrated (at her and me) that it didn’t work. I mess up all the time. I say sorry a lot.
The more I worked on this post, the more I noticed how similar (pretty much identical) our needs really are. Our children may need food, water, movement, quiet, familiar sensory input, fewer expectations, less screen time, and time to reset. BUT SO DO WE.
Maybe we should be parenting ourselves with the same care and intention we give to our children. We can’t always meet every need or show up perfectly regulated, but we can learn to notice what our own bodies and brains are asking for.
Creating this post was so emotional and so good for me. What a reminder that co-regulation does not require us to be perfect parents. It asks us to care for our own nervous systems so we can meet our children where they are as best we can.
Back-to-school regulation is not one size fits all. One child (*ahem* adult) may need movement or heavy work. Another may need a snack and connection. And another may simply need fewer expectations and room to feel some big feelings.
There will probably be more try and try agains than easy, regulated days. And that’s okay! Progress over perfection.
Sending your family all the calm nervous system vibes this school year. You’re doing amazing, my friends.
💛 Cabby
