07/11/2024
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Cone-troversy at Burning Man: Kiwi Coneheads Rally Behind Coney McConeface Amidst NZ's Anti-Cone Crusade
A tempest in a traffic cone is brewing as the New Zealand government's crackdown on these high-vis heroes has triggered a wave of outrage amongst cone enthusiasts worldwide, particularly amongst a passionate group of Kiwis known as the Guardians of the Cone.
"We were utterly flabbergasted when we heard the news," exclaimed a spokesperson for the Guardians, Hippathy Valentine. "Traffic cones are the unsung champions of our roads, guiding us through chaos with their vibrant orange glow. To speak of them with such disdain is simply preposterous!"
In a grand gesture of cone solidarity, the Guardians have commissioned a monumental tribute to these maligned marvels: Coney McConeface. This 18-metre colossus, set to be unveiled at Burning Man 2024, will serve as a beacon of hope for cones everywhere.
“Coney McConeface isn't just art; it's a symbol of cone resilience and a testament to their unwavering dedication to keeping us safe,” said Hippathy. “We invite everyone, including the New Zealand government, to join us in celebrating the humble cone's quiet heroism.”
To foster greater understanding and appreciation of traffic cones, the Guardians of the Cone are extending an open invitation to the New Zealand government to join them at Burning Man.
“We believe that once they experience the majesty of Coney McConeface and witness the joyous cone-themed festivities, they will surely see the error of their ways,” said Hippathy. “After all, who could resist the charm of a giant, glowing cone?”
About Coney McConeface:
Coney McConeface is a 18-metre replica of a traffic cone, created to celebrate the underappreciated heroes of traffic management. It will be unveiled at Burning Man 2024 and will serve as a symbol of cone resilience and a beacon of hope for cones worldwide. The project is led by New Zealand artists.
About the Guardians of the Cone:
The Guardians of the Cone are a light-hearted society devoted to the appreciation of traffic cones. They believe that cones are a vital part of our infrastructure and deserve our respect, admiration, and the occasional festive garland.
