Joann M. Martin

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*AITA for locking my gaming chair in my office so my pregnant girlfriend can't use it?Sounds petty and childish but just...
05/04/2026

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AITA for locking my gaming chair in my office so my pregnant girlfriend can't use it?

Sounds petty and childish but just hold judgement till the end.

My dad retired early last year and everything was thrown on my lap so things been pretty hectic eversince (only calming down during lockdown). My way of destressing from all of this is gaming. I wouldn't even call myself a gamer from infrequent I play and how bad I am. It's just nice just messing around for a few hours every weekend/fortnight. To maximize comfort, I invested in a $500 gaming chair and put it in our 'entertainment/chill room'. My gf is currently 6 months pregnant and wanted to get into gaming with her free time but eventually stopped. However she loved the chair and wanted to use it. Saw no foul so I said sure as long as she brings it back to that room when she's done. At first she did but then slowly started leaving it wherever she used it. Wouldn't be a problem if our 'entertainment room' wasn't upstairs and she wasn't using it downstairs (mostly outside). There are a few things more annoying than being mentally exhausted and having to go carrying around a chair because she forgot. Nevermind her eating on the chair and simply not caring enough to clean up crumbs or spills. I told her that if she couldn't return it back up stairs then she shouldn't take it downstairs. She said ok and then last Saturday I found the chair very much downstairs. Clearly she can't do it so after I used it, I put it in my office and locked it (which is always locked to avoid her son playing around with designs) and I told her about this. She's been moping around since and says it was uncalled for. I genuinely don't think I'm the a__hole because we got a chair specifically for her (which she chose for her comfort). aita?

*AITA for refusing to help my husband plan a father's day gift for HIS dad?I am 31F and my dad died late last summer com...
05/03/2026

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AITA for refusing to help my husband plan a father's day gift for HIS dad?

I am 31F and my dad died late last summer completely unexpectedly at age 58. My dad and I were extremely close and I would have qualified him as my best friend. He lived with us part time and was our childcare (kids age 4 and 1) for when we worked.

This year has been extremely hard for me - grief for me has not been a 'normal' progression. I have okay days and good days and days when I just can't even stop crying and missing my dad.

My husband is well aware of all of this and knows how much I miss my dad.

Anyways, I usually am the one who plans parties, gifts etc in our family. I am good at it, I'm organized, and I like doing it most of the time. My husband is a super procrastinator and all week has been complaining and moaning about how he needs to get his dad a father's day gift and begging me to help him figure out what to get him.

I am outright refusing because it hurts me that I don't get to get my dad a father's day gift this year and I just don't even frankly want to think about father's day. My husband hasn't said he thinks I'm being over the top but he keeps making little comments like 'ugh I wish you'd just help me out this once' re the father's day gift.

AITA for refusing to help with this?

Edit: thanks everyone for your responses! I read them all and I'm sorry I wasn't able to respond to everyone. I really appreciate all your insight. As one commenter said grief IS a sneaky little b__ch so It was messing with my ability to self reflect on the situation.

*WIBTA if i told my step-sister she is no longer allowed to be left alone with my daughter?My step-sister was thrilled w...
05/03/2026

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WIBTA if i told my step-sister she is no longer allowed to be left alone with my daughter?

My step-sister was thrilled when she found out i was having a baby, and when my daughter was born, she was in love with her. Always wanting to be around her, take care of her, hold her. All of which i didn't mind to start off with because that is any normal persons reaction, and we are both so close.

When my daughter got to around 9 months, i was letting my step-sister look after her while i worked, shopped and just did the little things i would do before i gave birth. I fully trusted her. Until i returned to find out she wasn't home, yet my daughter was.

I was shocked to say the least, and when my step-sister came home, i lashed out. She had been gone for half an hour, and luckily my daughter was left unharmed but she could crawl now and plug sockets were left turned on, chairs weren't tucked under and she could have gotten hurt in anyway. I am thinking about telling my sister she can't take care of my daughter at her house alone anymore...

is this the right choice? edit : my sister is 24

*AITA for hiding from a customer?I work at a cafe that closes at 3:30pm sharp. The majority of our customers place their...
05/03/2026

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AITA for hiding from a customer?

I work at a cafe that closes at 3:30pm sharp. The majority of our customers place their orders online instead on in-person, and they are allowed to place their order to be picked up until 3:30. In the last hour of the store being open, we pre-close (sweeping, mopping, dishes, etc.) so that we can leave by 3:45. There is one woman who consistently orders her coffee to be picked up at 3:30, which isn’t an issue, but the issue comes when she is always late to pick it up. I’ll be just about to leave or sitting on my b__t waiting for her for 10 minutes after I’ve finished closing. Last time she did this I let her know that if she isn’t here by the time staff is done for the night, her drink will be dumped and she’ll be refunded (owners don’t want us to sit around getting paid just waiting for her). She acknowledged this, but yesterday she was late again. I was walking up the basement stairs with my car keys, about to dump her drink when I heard her knocking on the door. I decided to hide down in the basement, thinking that the only way she’d realize she can’t keep being this late is if she wasn’t able to get her drink. 15 more minutes go by and she’s still pounding on the door, but she eventually gives up. I go back upstairs and dump her drink. Apparently she came back the next day to complain, but the owner was on my side (she was refunded btw). I feel bad about doing this, but everyone was sick of her assuming we’d wait for her.

So am I the a__hole for hiding from a customer when I could have easily just given her her drink?

*AITA for telling my girlfriend to stop picking up earthworms in front of my friends?There's literally no way of writing...
04/30/2026

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AITA for telling my girlfriend to stop picking up earthworms in front of my friends?

There's literally no way of writing this without it sounding weird but there you go...

My girlfriend (26F) and I (27M) have been dating for 3 months. She's super cool and it's all going really well, so I thought it was time to introduce her to my friends from school back home. Now, some things to note about my girlfriend: she's quite petite, probably about 5ft, and she dresses like - I quote - a 'kids' TV presenter.' She also gets very excited about things very easily. This means that she often gets read as being a lot younger than she actually is, which can be annoying but is also hilarious as she's probably the most intelligent person I've ever met. It's an odd contradiction but I think it's really cute.

When we got to my hometown, we decided to meet my friends at a local park which has a lake and a set of gardens. It had been raining the day before and the ground was still pretty wet, but we planned on walking around the lake with my friends, because we all live life on the edge. We got there and everyone seemed to like my girlfriend and they all got on well.

It changed when she noticed that there were lots of earthworms that had got themselves stranded on the wet pavement. My girlfriend is a complete softie when it comes to worms and snails and she always saves them whenever she sees them. It's a personality quirk. She has a folder of photos on her phone of all the worms and snail 'friends' she makes and she carries a bottle of hand sanitiser with her at all times, just in case.

So as soon as she realised that there were worms that needed saving, she got right to work, and just knelt down right there on the ground in front of my friends and started picking up the worms, literally talking to them and saying stuff like (I wish I were kidding) "let's sort you out, you've got yourself into a real...

*AITA for yelling at my girlfriend for being 45 minutes late to work after having just lost a job?My 23M girlfriend 22F ...
04/30/2026

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AITA for yelling at my girlfriend for being 45 minutes late to work after having just lost a job?

My 23M girlfriend 22F recently lost her job as a chef at a higher-end restaurant because of reasons unknown. she told me that her higher-ups were corrupt and we’re looking to get her out being one of the only other female chefs in the building.

I don’t know too much on that story I just know she got fired, I paid her rent for her because she was unable to pay after being fired and we both started looking for a new job for her. We end up finding a job that she can make $18 an hour working at a warehouse that’s closer to home.

Fast forward to today only maybe three or four weeks since getting the job - I am home from work during the week which is rare so I decided to take her to work because of the snow and bad weather. her alarm goes off probably around 740 and she decides she wants to lay in bed until 815.

She has to be at work at 8 so I start expressing my concern about her being late to work and she tries to tell me “Oh it’s fine her boss likes her and she could be late. It doesn’t matter to me. “ This is very disrespectful because being late is typically a way that you can get fired and she’s OK being late after I had just paid for her rent after she got fired once already, so I find it disrespectful that she would be OK being late and possibly risking her job. Especially just after losing one.

So we get into an argument that turns into some yelling and she gets upset saying I shouldn’t even care and it’s her life and her decisions and that I don’t need to worry about it. She then starts getting upset and crying because I told her to get her head on straight, she started making me feel bad for caring so much when I really just don’t want her to have to struggle to find another job but it does...

*AITA for telling my GF she needs to shower before we get into bed?My gf gets depressed sometimes (clinically) I do supp...
04/30/2026

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AITA for telling my GF she needs to shower before we get into bed?

My gf gets depressed sometimes (clinically) I do support her and try to be patient with her. I feel like I turn a blind eye to some things due to her depression. One of the things though is she goes through stages where her hygiene isn't great. She has mentioned previously how she sometimes has no motivation to shower when depressed. So she obviously is aware it's a thing. She's been going through that stage again but this time we actually live together. I knew she hadn't showered in at least 2 days. She was starting to really stink. I told her "you need to take a shower babe" she was shocked and cried. I said "I don't mean to hurt you. It's just I noticed you haven't showered in a few days and I can now smell it. We are about to get into bed together so you need to take a shower" she was really upset with me but she did shower. She's still upset and saying I'm cruel to her. But why would I want to smell someone right next to me in bed and have the sheets stink etc? I can't even be intimate with her or kiss her when she's going through this stage.

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03/27/2026

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2223 W Redondo Beach Boulevard
Gardena, CA
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