10/06/2026
I saw a post today about being angry over the childhood you didn't get and grieving the fact that you'll never get it back.
And my immediate thought was...
I don't want my childhood back.
Like... no thank you. Been there. π
And that actually stopped me for a minute.
Because I see SO much healing content about being angry with our parents, grieving what we didn't get and mourning the childhood we should have had.
And listen, my childhood certainly wasn't all sunshine, lollipops and rainbows. π
There were things that hurt me. Things that shaped me.
But childhood doesn't get exclusive rights to that s**t. π
Relationships. Friendships. Family. Heartbreak. Betrayal. Loss.
We pick things up along the way.
And apparently some of them hang around in the background running little programs in our brains that activate at the WORST possible times.
Cool. Cool. right!? π
But here's what hit me...
I don't need to still be hurt to acknowledge that I was hurt.
I don't have to stay angry with someone to acknowledge that they hurt me.
And I don't have to keep carrying something just because it mattered.
For me, healing these days looks a lot more like curiosity.
Ohhhh... THAT'S where I learned that.
Is THAT why I do this?
Is THAT why sometimes it's easier to convince myself I don't need something than to admit that I do?
Is THAT why expressing an unmet need can feel way scarier than it probably needs to?
And once I figure out what I learned to do to protect myself, the questions get even better...
Do I actually need to protect myself in this moment?
What am I protecting myself from?
Is it what's happening right now...
or something that happened with somebody else a long time ago?
And maybe the biggest one...
Is protecting myself from what might happen stopping me from experiencing what could happen?
Well, s**t. π©π€¬
Sometimes the thing that once protected us becomes the thing standing in our way.π€¦ββοΈ
And that's when I get to ask:
Do I still need it?
Sometimes the answer is...
Nope.
Thank you for your service. Your position has been eliminated. Please collect your belongings and see yourself out. π
That's really what I felt nudged to share today.
If you're angry, be angry. If you need to grieve, grieve. Feel whatever is actually there.
But you don't get extra healing points for suffering. π
You don't have to reopen every wound just to prove you've healed it.
Sometimes you understand where something came from, realize you don't need it anymore...
and put the fu**in thing down.
And if you're realizing you've been hauling around some emotional luggage that should've been lost by the airline YEARS ago... π
That's exactly the kind of stuff I love helping people unpack.
Preferably before they charge us an oversized baggage fee. ππ
Ready to put some s**t down? Come see me. π
Essential Lightworker
https://essential-lightworker.square.site/