25/09/2022
Why Me ???
He spent his whole life pleasing & working hard but he never even questioned why. He carried a heavy saddle & rider, loped endless circles, worked cattle, rode in a trailer down the scary highway, & stood tied for hours in the sun. He let them catch him everyday, he let them use spurs & whips, he let them work him a little too long, he let them feed him late, he let them be a little heavy handed but he accepted every single chore. He let them because of love & trust, though they weren't perfect he loved them anyway. They were his people, so he took care of them in everyway he could. He sacrificed his body in so many ways that nobody will ever know the whole story. He kept pushing on because they praised him when he won & he loved the attention. He loved his job & he loved his people. On & on it went for years, hard dirt, loose dirt, slick & sloppy dirt & dangerous, career ending dirt. He gave it his all, his guts & glory, he even sold his soul just so they could hold a trophy. He knew it would end, he knew his injuries would start to show but he had no worries for he knew his people would return the favor & take care of him forever. He dreamed of his retirement in lush, green pastures where he could piddle all day & just do nothing. Of hanging out with the babies & napping under the trees. And so the next morning he hobbled into the trailer, figuring to go see the vet. But when he unloaded everything looked strange, the whole atmosphere & energy was out of place. With his head held high & his nostrils flared, he was searching for something familiar but it wasn't there. He hugged close to his human looking for reassurance but there was no petting or soothing tones. He was led down a rough, concrete alley, pens & starved horses were everywhere. The smell of fear & depression & high strung nickers filled the air. It was unlike anywhere he had ever been before & every fiber in his old body was screaming at him to run for the door! He wanted to but he fought the urges back for he knew to trust his people in times like these. Loud, abrupt strangers came & took his favorite, champion halter off & replaced it with a dingy, old one. They took him away & slapped glue tags on him & slammed the loud gates. He ran to corner, head held high, he was searching for his people but he could just barely see them as they were walking away. Something was terribly wrong for they had forgot him, he started neighing loudly to alert them before they reached the door. But with a fist full of dollars & betrayal in the air, they just drove away & left him there. Night was falling & shear panic had set in, he had waited for his family to come back all day but they never did. The sun came up & went down for over a week & his people, his family never came back to get him. Every time a trailer would pull up he would get his hopes up just to be let down. Confused, exhausted & scared to death for the first time in his life, his light began to go dim & his try escaped. His soft, bright eyes grew hollow & hard & his whole body was sore. He spent those last few days wondering what he had done wrong, how did he let them down, why didn't they love him anymore? He once was a champion & they treated him like a king but now they threw him away like yesterday's trash. He felt so guilty & foolish that he fell for their tricks & played in their games. His only flaw was that he was loyal to a fault. Then one day they were all chased up the loading ramps to a big truck. The whole rig smelled of death & broken promises. And by the torturous looks on their faces they all seemed to know their fate. And as the former champion, somebody's one & only shipped off to slaughter, he just kept thinking why me????
Amy Havens
