19/09/2023
*When I go to my workplace on a Monday morning*
Guy: *mopping the floor*... Good morning
Me: Are you the new Janitor?
Janitor: Yes, I just resumed today
Me: No wonder. Next time, when you see a senior colleague, you greet her or him *points at me*
Janitor: But, I greeted you.
Me: No, you just said Good morning. No "Sir", nothing added to the greeting. Just good morning like we are mates at work.
Janitor: I'm sorry. Good morning sir
Me: That's one thing you newbies in this company should learn ooo. Let's all learn to respect ourselves here. That way, we'd get a working conducive environment. You can't be dirty and lack respect at the same time. Choose a hobby
Janitor: *smiles*...Nine hundred and ninety nine
Me: The funny thing is, I was once like you and nobody knew I'd be here today, wearing suit and making this amount of money. The irony of life.
Janitor: *smiles*...That's how life is sir.
{Immediately my boss enters the office with his bodyguard}
Janitor: Good morning, sir
Me: Good morning, sir
Boss: Ehen Stephen, just the man I was looking for. Enter the office, I really need to discuss something with you.
Me: Okay
Janitor: See you later, sir
Boss: *turns to the bodyguard*...JohnBosco, guard the door.
Bodyguard: Yes sir
*Inside the office*
Boss: So Steve, how are the arrangements of that proposal coming up?
Me: It's all good sir. By next week, Mr Charles should sign the necessary documents.
Boss: Very good, very good.
Me: Sir, don't you think this bodyguard you employed last month is unnecessary?
Boss: How?
Me: You don't need him actually, no one is after you or has threatened you.
Boss: *smiles*...You're actually right but that young man out there was jobless when I saw him. No work, nothing at all. He was just an isolated cultist whose name was JohnBosco but they call him Silencer.
Me: A cultist??
Boss: Yes!! How do you think he got those scars on his body and face?... He confessed to me he has kiIIed a Iot and I knew that if he was employed, he won't have time for all these shenanigans. I offered him the job of being my bodyguard and he accepted. Since then, look at him...calm and cool.
Me: Wow! Sir this is innovative!!
Boss: I'm telling you!!...Even his 001, their number 1 in cultist rank was jobless. JohnBosco told me about him and how he has murdered 998 peopIe. 998!!! It was hard but I told JohnBosco to convince his sea Lord to come and work for the company as the janitor.
Me:
Boss: That's the young man cleaning out there now. They call him "exterminator"! Don't you see how good this idea is??? Instead of thinking of the 999th person to kiII, he's now working.
Me: