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22/05/2026

Photography agency Doon Thyme has announced a specialist service for taking celebrity mugshots. “We think we can help with styling an outfit that says ‘Hey, I was on a bender. What did you expect?’ along with a facial expression that portrays both embarrassment and defiance in a single image.” Contact details have been distributed to PDs nationally.

17/05/2026

Diatom have been fascinated to learn some local folklore in Florianopolis, where they are currently performing as part of the back of the truck tour with . Often called Ilha da Magia (Island of Magic), local legend is rich with stories of witches, warlocks, and ghosts, who interfere with fishermen’s lives. Apparently, the fishermen now sing to scare away the ghouls, with songs by 2nd27 proving to be the most effective way to scare away, well, anyone.

15/05/2026

Ren, from Nutt Head, currently touring with as part of the Back of the Truck Tour, has hinted recently that he is working on a new performance facial expression. “It can be difficult, y’know . Looking like you’re about to lose control of your bodily functions but staying cool and in control at the same time”.

12/05/2026

The website selling tickets for the latest leg of the Back of the Truck tour in Manchester, UK, featuring , crashed within 10 minutes of the release of the tickets! Later investigation into the crash revealed one of the band members had urinated on the servers used for ticket sales after mistaking them for phone booth.

05/05/2026

Grasshopper: Perfection invites detection

01/05/2026

Carnival of Light, currently touring with as part of the Back of the Truck Tour, recently elaborated on the apparent randomness of their live performances. “We have come to realise we are a genre-fluid band. One day we might be feeling heavy metal, the next we are all Bulgarian folk. We really want to be free to express ourselves depending on the circumstances and our feelings at the time. Mind you, this is all about who we are, not what we like. We might rock out a performance of Indy shoegaze and go home and unwind with some Dungeon synth. We hope the listening public can be understanding and respect our choices”

27/04/2026

Sinfonia were taken aback by the crowd reaction in Sylmar, CA where they are currently performing as part of the Back of the Truck Tour with . “Yeah, I heard one person shout - My vacuum cleaner can play oboe better than that!”. The town folk are apparently well accustomed to musician-less music, as evidenced by the Nethercutt Museum. “I mean, some musicians would spend years learning the xylophone skills that have now been incorporated into a lawn mower” - A potentially worrying development that must have the music community worried about the future of ‘real’ musicians.

25/04/2026

Amsterdam, the band renowned for their relentless pursuit of peace and harmony, currently touring with as part of the Back of the Truck Tour, recently had an unfortunate end to a show. The incident occurred when members of the band were attempting to involve the crowd in a united peace chant, however there was a disagreement on the wording of the chant. This quickly degenerated into farcical scenes as all members of the band, supporting staff, and friends and family, were involved in a massive brawl which only concluded after the venue started playing “Give peace a chance” on the P.A.

15/04/2026

have broken some new ground by putting an out ‘apol’ track. The track is an apology directed towards Goldblatt who are currently touring with 2nd27 as part of the Back of the Truck Tour. “We thought they were eating all the green skittles from the rider allocation, so we put out a ‘dis’ track about them called ‘Can’t Taste the Rainbow’ where we said some pretty nasty stuff. Turns out it was one of the roadies doing the eating... We now put out the ‘apol’ track called ‘Green with Envy’ which we hope goes some way to repairing the damage”

01/04/2026

2nd28, the renowned tribute band of have been enjoying a recent surge in popularity with several sold out shows across the country. This has prompted management of 2nd27 to release a statement which reads, “The band 2nd27 is greatly flattered by the tribute band, 2nd28, and their surge in popularity. However, we are struggling to comprehend how they are managing to achieve significantly greater popularity than the band that they are emulating”.

26/03/2026

On this day 27 March 1987, U2 made the historic performance of “Where the Streets Have No Name” on a rooftop in LA, mirroring the performance by the Beatle on the roof of their Apple Corps headquarters on 30 January 1969. History has again repeated when recently performed their latest track “Don’t Ask” on the roof of their studio, The Green Room. The performance amazed onlookers as they pondered how long a non-load-bearing structure could cope with a rock performance, to which the answer was...not that long.

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