11/10/2024
Meet the founder of the Museum of Femininity: Ms Evelyn Goode 🌸
Evelyn is a critically acclaimed director of stage and screen, and the lead singer/song-writer of 10-time grammy award winning folk band; Sinners Prayer.
She was recognised as a child prodigy by the age of 8 months (pre-birth), where doctors were stunned by her remarkable sense of rhythm.
She is a humanitarian and pescetarian.
She is rumoured to have invented electricity, having gifted the patent to Benjamin Franklin when he was down on his luck.
She once briefly died and is said to be the only person who truly knows what awaits us after death. She is incredibly private about this experience, once stating “If you knew what I know, there is no hope for any of us.” This phrase went on to inspire Shrek the Third.
The 95% of the ocean that is yet to be explored is only yet to be explored because although she’s been to all of it, she wasn’t exploring, she was on holiday.
She is sexually fluid; notable dating experiences include being Jeremy Corbyn’s first love and turning down a proposal from the girl with the pearl earring three times. She is anti-marriage, and has only ever been married once, to Channing Tatum, as a joke.
In 1997 she turned down a Nobel Prize in Chemistry for ethical reasons.
Attendees of Julie Andrews’ 58th birthday party say that, as her gift to Andrews, she performed Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony in its entirety, playing every instrument simultaneously.
One of her eyelashes is on display at the Louvre. It is the only one she has lost to date.
She has no children and considers the Museum of Femininity to be her baby. She has contracted three other staff members to help realize her vision. It is the only museum of its kind. The idea for it came to her when she was inside Madonna’s sensory deprivation tank.
“I am living for the opening of the Museum of Femininity. It promises to be the best event this planet has ever seen!” - Gordon Ramsey