17/05/2026
‘ALWAYS GIFTED’ - remembering my father.
I first shared this doodle story a month after we suddenly lost our father, Oebele de Boer, four years ago today. It tells a story that says something about his generosity of spirit.
For a number of years, my father filled his cupboards with homemade jars, full to the brim with pickled courgettes. He didn’t even like to eat them himself, but as soon as the first courgettes of the season would be ready to be harvested, he was in the kitchen cutting courgettes and onions until late in the evening to get them ready to be pickled.
Whenever we would visit him he would proudly open his cupboard and display how many jars he had made! The joy it would give us all watching him be so joyful about it was priceless. He would also generously give a jar to anyone who wanted one. Family, friends and neighbours.
This loving act was also the thing that later brought him more love in the shape of his girlfriend, Anne, who became his companion after my mother died. Amongst other things, they shared this love of growing and then pickling these courgettes.
At the funeral, many people came up to us to tell us they were the grateful recipients of these little jars of green gold. Afterwards, when we went to see the solicitor, she mentioned unprovoked that her best friend, who lived close to my father, used to receive a few jars from him.
Every jar was gifted, without him ever needing anything in return for it. It just gave him joy and pride in a job well done and he revelled in the appreciation and conversation.
These little jars were more than just a jar of pickled courgettes. They were filled with love and generosity and created an opportunity for connection.
Cont’d in comments ….
