Tova Leigh - My Thoughts about stuff

Tova Leigh - My Thoughts about stuff Hi my name is Tova! I am a writer, performer and digital creator based in London, UK. I also co-hosts a weekly podcast Till Death Do Us Pod with my husband Mike.
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I started my blog - My Thoughts About Stuff - in 2015 as a creative outlet and because I wanted to share the struggles I faced as a new mom with other women. My viral online series Mom Life Crisis which documents my own mid life crisis following a health scare, resonated with millions of women across the world and later became a documentary film on Amazon Prime Video. In March 2019 I released my f

irst book ‘F*cked at 40: Life Beyond Suburbia, Monogamy and Stretch Marks’. The book is for every woman that has ever felt trapped in the norms society forces upon women. My second book ‘You Did What?’ was released in September 2021 and is a collection of the best confessions I have heard over the years along with my own stories and insights on the connection between having secrets and feeling shame. I am a mother of three girls and am a passionate feminist. My content is about motherhood, relationships, feminism and more, some is funny and some not so much lol. Please check out my website to find out when my next live show is on and about my online courses and all the other things I am doing - if you sign up to my news letter you'll never miss anything! www.tovaleigh.com

Thank you for being here! Lots of love,

Tova x

14/07/2026

Anyone else able to give themselves a standing ovation?! 🤪😂

Tickets for my new tour are officially on sale! Fifty Shades of RAGE (the perimenopause version of 50 shades of grey), t...
14/07/2026

Tickets for my new tour are officially on sale!

Fifty Shades of RAGE (the perimenopause version of 50 shades of grey), talking all things s*x 👿 From desire and self-pleasure to va**nal dryness, hormones, feminism, and motherhood, absolutely nothing is off limits.

Bold, brutally honest, and laugh-out-loud funny, Fifty Shades of RAGE is modern womanhood, unfiltered, loud, honest, and always well-lubed. 18+

Cities I’ll be visiting include: PARIS, COLOGNE, ANTWERP, UTRECHT, AMSTERDAM, LONDON, COPENHAGEN, STOCKHOLM, OSLO, LISBON.

Let me know where else you’d like me to go?

Book 👉🏻 https://www.livenation.co.uk/tova-leigh-tickets-adp1470722

13/07/2026

It’s just like a nose bleed… but taking the scenic route 🤪 wouldn’t you agree?!

Women are often framed as the problem… time to flip the script 🙌🏻
13/07/2026

Women are often framed as the problem… time to flip the script 🙌🏻

Women have spent decades being sold the idea that their ge****ls should smell like roses, vanilla or “fresh linen.”Meanw...
13/07/2026

Women have spent decades being sold the idea that their ge****ls should smell like roses, vanilla or “fresh linen.”

Meanwhile, the va**na is literally designed to maintain itself.

Yes - wash your v***a. Yes - practice good hygiene. But the obsession with deodorising, perfuming and “fixing” women’s bodies has created an impossible standard that medicine doesn’t actually support.

The irony?

The body part that gets marketed the most hygiene products is the one that’s naturally equipped to maintain its own internal environment.

Yet we rarely see the same pressure placed on men.

This isn’t about saying men are unhygienic.

It’s about asking why one s*x is taught that perfectly normal smells are a personal failure, while the other is largely given a pass.

Maybe it’s time we stopped treating women’s bodies like problems waiting to be solved 🤷‍♀️

A few days ago I posted a video explaining that va**nas are self-cleaning organs and that the endless parade of strawber...
12/07/2026

A few days ago I posted a video explaining that va**nas are self-cleaning organs and that the endless parade of strawberry-scented washes, douches and “feminine hygiene” products are, in most cases, unnecessary.

The women in the comments understood the assignment immediately.

The men? Well… a small but very vocal handful decided I’d personally declared war on pen*ses.

For context, I asked a simple question: if women have been sold an entire industry dedicated to “fixing” perfectly healthy v***as, where are the equivalent aisles full of products telling men to perfume, bleach and deodorise their balls?

That wasn’t an attack on men.

It was an observation about marketing. About society. About double standards.

For decades, women have been taught that our bodies are embarrassing, dirty, smelly or in constant need of improvement. There are billion-dollar industries built on convincing women that a healthy va**na somehow needs to smell like a tropical cocktail.

Meanwhile, male ge****ls have largely escaped the same commercial scrutiny.

Apparently pointing that out is now “toxic femininity.”

The irony is almost too perfect.

Nothing proves the point faster than people becoming enraged because someone questioned a double standard.

One commenter was particularly generous. After I thanked him for boosting my engagement (which, incidentally, helps pay my bills), he replied that he hoped I’d be able to “afford all the abortions under my belt.”

It’s fascinating how quickly some people jump from a conversation about women’s anatomy to trying to shame women for their reproductive choices.

I’ve never had an abortion - but that’s completely beside the point.

Even if I had, why would that be a stranger’s business? Why is a woman’s value still so readily linked to what she does with her own body?

It’s remarkable how often discussions about women’s health end with attempts to police women’s autonomy.

The comments didn’t upset me.

If anything, they perfectly illustrated the culture I was talking about in the first place.

So, to everyone who engaged thoughtfully - thank you.

And to the handful of angry men who helped push the video to even more people…

Your outrage has been incredibly supportive of the algorithm.

I appreciate your service.

12/07/2026

Women shaped history but their stories were often deleted…

12/07/2026

Hot flashes, slow motion 😂

11/07/2026

Here’s why I don’t care about the male loneliness pandemic…

One of the most common things I hear whenever the conversation about birth control comes up is:“I don’t trust men to use...
11/07/2026

One of the most common things I hear whenever the conversation about birth control comes up is:

“I don’t trust men to use condoms properly.”

Read that again.

We’ve become so used to the idea that women should carry the burden of preventing pregnancy that we’ve stopped questioning why we feel we can’t rely on men to share that responsibility.

Instead, society has normalised it.

“Just go on the pill.”

Never mind that hormonal contraception can mean years of taking medication, medical appointments, trial and error, and for some women, side effects that affect their mood, body or overall wellbeing.

That’s considered the easier option.

Why?

Because asking a man to wear a condom is often treated as asking too much.

Think about that.

Society somehow convinced us that one person’s temporary inconvenience is reason enough for another person to take on a long-term responsibility. That men can’t be trusted and so we shouldn’t expect them to share the responsibility.

But maybe that’s exactly the problem.

Why have we accepted that as the standard?

Imagine if our response wasn’t, “Women should protect themselves because men won’t.”

Imagine if our response was, “Men should be expected to take equal responsibility because preventing pregnancy is their responsibility too.”

Women have been laughed for decades how to avoid pregnancy. Maybe it’s time we became just as committed to teaching boys and men that contraception isn’t something women do for them.

It’s something partners do together.

The goal shouldn’t be a world where women have to carry the burden because they don’t trust men.

The goal should be a world where men are expected to step up - and where doing so isn’t exceptional.

It’s simply what responsible adults do.

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