20/05/2026
My Dad died on the 7th of May. This last week has been really difficult. They talk about grief coming in waves. And it really does. Some days I’m numb others ok, the last two have been the worst. It’s being ok then seeing something and thinking ”i need to show dad that”. And then it hits the hardest all over again. Like a sledgehammer, knees dropping to the floor pain, remembering he’s gone.
We haven’t always seen eye to eye but the last two years we had been slowly rebuilding and while caring for him at the end it was like we were back when I was small. Thick as thieves, together.
He’s the reason I love history and my love of art. He’s the reason I believed my dreams were worth pursuing either from encouragement or out of spite.
I knew this was coming, but I hadn’t appreciated how it was going to impact everything.
Please bear with me at this time. I know I’ve been saying it for a while. The last 6weeks, really the last few months have been a rollercoaster of nightmare fuel. I hope to eventually get back to ‘normal’ whatever that is.
The first photo is from Xmas. When he was the most well he’d been in years. The next is from 2020. And the last is us together when I was 9 or 10. I want to remember him this way. Healthy happy and in his veg patch.
