20/06/2026
‘Mistley Swan’ - 2000. Pencil and compressed charcoal on sketchbook paper.
There are few animals better qualified than the swan to expose the defects of human seriousness. It is white, sculptural, severe, and capable at any moment of behaving like a badly managed farmyard implement. This combination appealed to me very much during my years at Mistley Green, when I spent many hours down at the quay, drawing, photographing, loitering in a manner that might have appeared suspicious had I not been equipped with a sketchbook.
The Mistley swans gathered by the quay whether the tide was up, down, in retreat, reconsidering its position, or absent without leave. At low tide the drop from the quay was considerable, and the ships in port rested on the mud at a jaunty angle, suggesting that maritime dignity, like human dignity, is dependent on favourable conditions. The swans, however, retained theirs in all circumstances. They carried on with their preening and their stately disputes, moving through the estuary as if under the impression that they owned the place, which, morally speaking, they probably did.
On the grassy bank near the road, outside Manningtree, they were regularly fed by visitors with picnic remains, bread being the principal instrument of misguided affection. There was also a group called Swans in Need, who performed the more responsible task of feeding them grain donated by local industry. I have always admired that name. It has the blunt poetry of a parish notice and the gravity of a national emergency. One imagines minutes being taken, motions passed, sacks opened, and the swans, wholly ungrateful, receiving the benefits of organised benevolence.
The most memorable swan incident occurred when one bird, through some failure of navigation, arrived at my doorstep on Mistley Green. I was working at the table in my bay window when I was disturbed by a gentle but insistent tapping at the front door. I opened the door to be hissed at by this swan on my threshold. This was not where a swan should have been. A swan at the water’s edge is a symbol. A swan at the doorstep is a problem in civic administration. The neighbours appeared. Motorists were delayed in the ex*****on of their journeys. The bird, for its part, looked both magnificent and completely at a loss, like royalty encountering a naked toothbrush.
By means of quiet coaxing, a trail of grain, outstretched arms, local knowledge and mild panic, we escorted it back across the road towards the Stour. I remember the solemn absurdity of the thing: a procession arranged around a single bewildered bird, everyone involved pretending that this was the sort of occurrence for which adulthood had fully prepared them. When it reached the others there was wing-beating and a volume of sound sufficient to revise the whole question of muteness in swans. “Mute,” in this context, seemed to mean only “not conversational in English.”
I fed them often enough from my hand and was never frightened of them. Their beaks had a roughness inside, a serrated arrangement which put one in mind of the small print in a contract. But they were mostly gentle, taking what was offered with eagerness and a certain proprietary expectation. Their beauty was never separate from appetite. The white curve, the black mask, the long neck folding into shadow — all of it belonged equally to ceremony and hunger.
The drawing, therefore, brings back not only the swan but the whole Mistley atmosphere: the quay, the mudflats, the pallets, the maritime leftovers, the old shipbuilding histories, the Rigbys, the Horlocks, the Thames barges, my listed cottage on the Green, and the more improbable social fact of having Terence Davies, the screen writer and film director and literary agent Tony Peake, Derek Jarman’s friend and biographer among my neighbours. At my fiftieth birthday I pitched Tony a novel about Marcel Duchamp and Gabrielle Picabia, which, in a rare display of narrative discipline, did not get written.
Perhaps this swan is that novel’s true surviving character. It lowers its head into darkness with an expression at once secretive, dignified and faintly accusatory. It appears to know something about Mistley, about me, about the road-crossing incident, about bread, grain, shipyards and failed literary ambition. It keeps its counsel, which is more than can be said for most of us.
This drawing gathers all that without announcing it. The swan bends inward, almost disappearing into its own shadow, and in that dark fold I find Mistley again: the quay at low tide, the tilted ships, the grain, the halted traffic, the famous neighbours, the unwritten novel, the serrated beak, and the absurd solemnity of escorting a lost bird back to the estuary. It is, in the end, a drawing of a swan. But a swan, properly considered, is never merely a swan. It is a white problem with feathers, and sometimes, by accident, a keeper of memory.