06/11/2024
ENGLISH GRAMMAR
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A young girl newly married to a professor of
English ran to her mother and said she was
tired of the 2 week old marriage and would
never go back to him.
-
The shocked mother asked her what the
problem was.
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The girl said her husband is so obsessed with his field of study that even outside the classroom, he teaches English to everyone that comes his way.
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She said she cannot hold a 5 minute
discussion with him plainly without him
bringing long, high sounding words that
often leave her confused and with a severe
headache.
-
The mother asked for examples of such
trouble causing expressions and the girl
said:
-
Yesterday, I asked him if the plumber had
fixed the leaking tap.
-
He said: My response to your inquiry is
positively in the affirmative.
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The mother asked the girl: What does that
mean?
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The girl replied: He simply meant yes.
-
Last week, I asked him if it is true his
friend really travelled and he said:
His proclamation is a gross distortion of
reality a reflection of terminological
inexactitude.
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The amazed mother said: Wow, meaning
what?
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The girl said:
He meant to say he lied.
-
Another time, I asked why he looked pale
and he said:
My general systemic metabolism standard is physiologically in a state of total
indisposition.
-
The frightened mother asked her daughter:
Oh my, what did he mean by that?
-
The girl said:
Oh, he meant he was ill.
Again, last Tuesday, I told him I heard on
the radio that man will soon land on Mars.
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He said: I find that assertion so ludicrous
that I cant help but explode in a mirthful
guffaw.
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The mother asked:
Really? And what did he do?
-
The girl replied:
He just laughed.
-
Finally, on Sunday afternoon, my friend
visited us, and as she was going, he said:
-
This is wishing you an expeditionary voyage
and a locomotive advancement to your
ultimate destination.
-
Mother said: Unbelievable ! What message
was he passing to her?
-
Girl said: Go well.
-
The mother said:
Enough ! Say no more.
Remain at home. I wont let him kill you.
Pass me that panadol extra...
😁🤣😆😜Do have a happiferous week ahead. Laughter is good for the body, soul and spirit.
May you never experience sorrow but laughter throughout the week and hence
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