K.Hesman Studio

04/04/2026

Another home painting ✨

08/15/2025

It is the coolest thing to watch creative ability expand. There’s something so pure about creativity that hasn’t yet been influenced by the world’s opinions and expectations. ✨

10/31/2021

10/15/2021

One in four pregnancies end in a loss. Thinking of those who are remembering and grieving today. We are remembering our three babes. Our first baby would have been 6 months this month.

I read a post recently, and I can’t remember where. But it essentially said, we are our stories. And it is in the sharing of our stories that we truly connect with others. These babies are our stories. They were real. Some of them once had beating hearts and others didn’t get the chance. They existed, and we can and should talk about them. One in four is too often. More of us know this pain than should. You are not alone 🤍

Today and for the month of October, all proceeds from my Female Reproductive Rope Print will go towards PAIL, an organization dedicated to providing resources and support for pregnancy and infant loss. You can find this print on my website (link in bio) under Available Work > Print shop.

10/14/2021

I have added an update to our Art for IVF page on my website (link in Bio). It’s not the happiest of updates. It has been a rough couple of months on the IVF front, but our doctor is optimistic that there are still things we can try and that we’ll find success along the way. Long story short, I’ve decided to continue with our Art for IVF saga, and to support our continued and rising (the protocols are getting complicated) expenses and travel back and forth to Toronto, I have decided to raffle off two original painting options, one oil abstracted cityscape and one watercolour landscape (swipe for pictures). Tickets will be $30 or 2 for $50 for the oil painting or $10 each for the mini watercolour landscape. E-transfers can be sent to [email protected] with the name, number of tickets, and email address included in the details. The draw will be October 30th.

For those of you who haven’t been following our journey with IVF but want to catch up, there are highlights on my page with saved stories as well as a general summary on my website (link in bio). As always, thank you so much for the support. If this raffle doesn’t interest you, that’s okay. Your thoughts, well-wishes, prayers, and good vibes are always appreciated here.

09/07/2021

Our transfer failed. We’re both hurting as this leaves us with a lot of questions and very few answers.

As I’ve previously mentioned, in the world of infertility, it’s often trial and error, and something has to go wrong several times before anything is done about it. (I.e., You have to try unsuccessfully for a year before being referred to a fertility specialist or you have to have 3 or more miscarriages before you’re sent for genetic testing.) Im not sure if we’ll be able to change up my protocol or if they’ll write this off as a fluke. It’s certainly not indicative of future success, but we can’t help but worry and wonder how many embryos we’ll lose like this. Any further testing is not covered by OHIP or the funded IVF cycle. It could be a long and expensive road, and that’s tough to have hanging over us. So much medication, time, energy, and money was spent on an empty cycle, and it’s a pretty overwhelming feeling to have to just start back up again. We are tired.

Until now, I would say our IVF experience has been pretty “ideal” (albeit exhausting beyond reason) with very few bumps. It can be a lot messier, a lot more expensive, and a lot more time consuming, and my heart goes out to those who are hurting in any stage infertility. 🤍 Perspective can be helpful, but this doesn’t change how we are feeling in our own experience. We are allowing ourself the time and space to to feel what we are feeling.

I’ll be taking some time away from social media and sensitive content to work on commissions and prepare for my MSW (which starts in a week). My dms are always open for questions about infertility/loss and of course for art inquiries. I’ll have some information about holiday promotions (yes I know it’s still SUMMER) in the next couple months. As always, thanks for the support. I wanted to be as real as possible about how the IVF process, and this is part of the process.

08/24/2021

Yesterday was our transfer day.

It was a very emotional day, and I’m so glad to say it went well and we are hoping for the best. We are grateful to everyone that has been holding space for us throughout this process, being excited and hopeful for us in times we just didn’t feel like we could be. We have greatly appreciated the support. It has been a difficult year, and we can’t believe we’re already here. The IVF process has been truly exhausting and we’ve had to draw on strength we didn’t even know we had.

It has been an honour to share our journey with you, we have been learning so much about the IVF process and have been happy to spread some awareness. However, I’m not sure when we will feel ready to share any news about our transfer. Regardless of whether the transfer is a success, we are going to need to take time to process. After recurrent losses, even a positive test, while being a thing to celebrate, can be triggering and anxiety provoking. There are a lot of mental and emotional hurdles to overcome. If the transfer is not successful, that will be its own kind of disappointment, while we grieve our embryo and lost time/money/energy.

Thank you in advance for granting us this space and allowing us time to process. We hope we have wonderful news to share when the time comes. 🤍

(Featured is an ultrasound picture of where they put the embryo, and now we wait and hope for it to stick) 🤞🏻

07/17/2021

For those of you who have been following our journey with infertility and pregnancy loss, we’ve begun our next steps with IVF.

If you need to be caught up, you can watch some of the highlights on my page where I talk about what it is like to deal with infertility and loss and the myth of ‘funded’ IVF. I’ve written a longer summary of our journey and posted it to my website (link in bio) if you are interested in the whole story.

In short, in a turn of events, we got called for our funded cycle a year earlier than we anticipated and with very little warning. This is incredibly exciting, but in order to support our trips back and forth from Toronto and the many expenses that fall outside of ‘funded’ cycles, I’ve decided to raffle off a large custom painting (options available, but around 36 x 48). Many people have messaged me asking how they can help us, and this was one way that I thought would allow me to give something back.

Tickets are $30 each or two for $50. The raffle opens up today and closes on the 30th of July. We’ll draw the winner soon after. Message me to purchase tickets, and I'll get your information and send you the e-transfer email!

04/20/2021

Today was our baby’s due date.

We wish April could have been a different kind of month. We spent the morning reflecting on the ‘what could have beens’ and letting them go.

After our second miscarriage in January, and following all the testing and specialist appointments we had to wait for after we found out about Gideon’s Robertsonian translocation, we made the decision to try another IUI this month. On April 1st, we found out that the initial process didn’t work and we would not be doing an IUI after all. It’s difficult to open yourself up to a possibility and be shut down so hard. This rollercoaster is one of the reasons we’ve decided it was our last go at IUI. At this point, we’ll be waiting for a funded IVF cycle. If successful, the genetic testing would significantly improve our chances of transferring a viable embryo and hopefully decrease our chances of a miscarriage (at least one for chromosomal reasons). For us, this means that we won’t be having a baby this year and likely not next year either as the referral process is long, and the waitlist is longer. Expectations can be tough to let go of, but we are managing.

Throughout this process, however, we’ve made a point to keep ourselves busy and continue working towards our goals both as a couple and individually. I put off my master’s for a couple years, not wanting to have to take a leave of absence if our treatments were successful, but this past year, I made the decision that I was going to apply for Fall 2021 no matter what and that I wouldn’t put my life on hold for fertility any longer. So we’ll wait for IVF, and in the meantime, I’ll complete my MSW, we’ll work on our business (when COVID allows), and we’ll keep on doing the things that feed our souls so that when we do get to add to our family, we are so so ready.

Even though we are taking a step back, my DMs are always open to chat about my experience or hear about yours. Thanks to everyone who has sent kind words, cards, meals, or gifts in the last six months. Community is everything, and though it has looked different during this pandemic, we have felt the love. This has been a tough year, but cheers to growth and moving forward. ✨

02/12/2021

I’m back to working with oils and it feels good. They’re so much more forgiving than watercolour, and I love the texture of the canvas coming through. I’ve been trying to take more intentional time to create. Not necessarily with a plan in mind, but just to expend some creative energy and find some solace in it when there really isn’t much to hold onto right now. This has been the longest winter of my life. Experiencing any type of loss or grief, especially when it’s ongoing, is so difficult. But throw in social isolation and a lockdown during what are already the toughest months of the year to get through, and I don’t even have words to describe where I’m at. I’m sure there are many that can relate to this.

Our fertility treatments are on hold indefinitely as we await the results of some tests and further news about the status of our infertility/our odds for having a genetic child. Anyone who has been through this process will tell you that the waiting is one of the most excruciating parts. It’s so wild to have one of your greatest expectations in life in question. This isn’t what we’re taught to expect when we decide to start a family. Yet 1 in 6 couples experience infertility. It is very possible reality, and with infertility comes the loss of the ‘normative’ pregnancy experience. The loss of innocence and excitement around trying to start a family naturally; the loss of any sort of any element of surprise because everything is so regimented. You watch people say they want to start a family and just start one, knowing that will never be your experience. I’m not sharing this to make anyone sad or to garner pity, but because this experience is another normal. And the reality is, when we only propagate the ‘normative’ reproductive experience, it leaves a lot of people feeling abnormal and alone.

01/14/2021

Thanks for those who sent birthday wishes and messages. Unfortunately, I spent my birthday confirming yet another pregnancy loss. Our journey is now one of recurrent loss with no answers yet as to why. This loss was much earlier than the last, but it still stings. For those dealing with infertility, every loss or failed fertility cycle means weeks of medication, injections, appointments, etc. lost as well. Depending on medical coverage, it may also mean a significant amount of money lost as well. For Gideon and I, this loss means potentially months before we can attempt another cycle, the increased possibility of another loss, and the likelihood that we will not be having a baby this year, which is a tough pill to swallow. While it is a slight relief that IUI seems to work for us—and getting pregnant is already a huge hurdle to get past—the next hurdle is just as big and just as painful.

This account has been about art, entrepreneurship, honing my craft, and sharing it with others. But where you have art, that art is inevitably informed by the life, culture, and experiences of the artist. This is my story right now. This is the heart from which my work flows, and I think that kind of information is important to know about someone who creates. And if sharing my story helps bring about a realistic understanding of fertility and loss and helps even one person feel less alone in their own experience, that means everything to me. I hope for a time where more people feel comfortable sharing their very normal experiences and don’t feel like they have to hide something that has inevitably changed them.

A dear friend sent me this card and pin. She didn’t know about this recent loss, but the timing was impeccable. Thanks to those who worked hard to make my day special given the circumstances. It isn’t that there was nothing to celebrate. It’s very possible to feel both gratitude for life and the privilege that you have while being absolutely devastated, and it’s important to hold space for the complexity of those feelings. My dms are always open for anyone with questions about my experience or who would like to talk about their own.

01/01/2021

Now that Christmas is over, I can post some of these beauties! They were so fun to create.

This year was pretty slow for me in terms of creating. I didn’t have a lot of energy or time. Fertility cycles were both mentally and emotionally time consuming on top of my regular job/ amidst a pandemic, and our miscarriage sent us reeling.

What a year. I don’t feel too intent on finding beauty in this year or searching out the positives. It was a tough one, I’m okay to leave it at that. Im grateful that in my grief I had a craft to pour into and a partner with an unending amount of love to give.

🥂 Cheers to a new year filled with opportunities, greater love, and a more in-depth understanding of who we are.