Dichotomies bound by a Gradient Soul

Dichotomies bound by a Gradient Soul Excerpts of my book, "The Theory of everything and nothing: echo echo echo"

It's the intro to my new chapter but I have another painting for you. Check out the cover:Backstory to the piece. I had ...
03/25/2026

It's the intro to my new chapter but I have another painting for you. Check out the cover:
Backstory to the piece. I had a dream, Nevaeh had been taken by the FBI and placed in a high secure facility for gifted children but she was unhappy, suicidal and missed me. They experimented on her and she just wanted to learn it naturally through working with me. Several children felt the same way as they could hear my frequencies. So one day my location device began working again, I tracked where she was and created a massive earthquake to distract everyone, sent out an apolcolypse frequency to instill fear into anyone standing in the path of me and my child's reunion. I blasted the doors to the academy wide open as the ground began to shake all around me. I walked up the stairs into the classroom and Nevaeh knew right away. I looked at her current tcha with appreciation but discern. It was time for us to do the thing and nothing could stop us. They tried. Shots fired to my abdomen. No big deal just the new universe inside there...I told the children in the frequency to follow to the next universe, plan B. Nevaeh and I walked out hand in hand, her age and my age in a flow state out systems merging in unison. I was severely injured and the ground eas beginning to split as we made our way under the metal archways of the entrance to the acadamy. I told her to get to the water immediately, Who is coming to help. And she knew. We didn't need to speak about anything. Our intuition with each other was/is forever seamless in time. We are woven threads bound to each other. Once I made it to the pool, her in the shallows, myself rollin in the deep we started building. We took off our clothing. We show up naked, we go out naked. Once the dome around the pool was built we faced each other and our solarplexis opened and they briefly joined in fusion to distribute energy power and wisdom. I had to transfer to her in case I finally was about to die. I gave her all I had left and as we separated, her baby brother, Who emerged from my body, and although he was a creature of the water, I advised her to go to the tree people. The fungi and trees have ancient knowledge that will guide her if I can't. She wrapped her baby brother in her arms and climbed out of the pool and ran to the nearest tree while I expanded the circle of protection. More children were entering the water by this time and helping build and protect. The tree people, upon nevaehs arrival sent out an emergency frequency to nature and they lifted up from their roots and walked holding Nevaeh holding who over to the water and jumped in to be with me as we transcended to the new universe. I called it pllh balance
Turn it offfffffffffff
And that's how this planet was formed again after the collapse of the universe

01/04/2026

Sometimes I wonder who I Am. And why I am that person. People try to take over and sometimes I wish that they do. How do I know these premonitions and stress out everyone for possibly no reason? Other then the times it has happened....I am concerned about the future of our economy, of our safety, of our civilizations...we need peace love light harmony. I need help because all the rules I had were broken and everyone in my city wants to destroy me. So they break all the rules and im in danger.
1) don't lie to me
2)don't steal from me
3)don't attack my family
4)you don't have to love me you don't even have to like me, but you will respect me
5)no a**l
6)no babies
Help universe. We need you united instead of divided. I know I usually write in poetry but this is a crisis
There are people being murdered and tortured everywhere in chilliwack. Its hell here. Please send in the army, navy, nations unite and call and pray to all the Gods or Satan's or witches or fairies or aliens. Pray for help for our planet

10/27/2025

Respect walk: respond species Jesus's or marked. Half a star and both of you 1.5 or put the k above the w and flip upside down looks similar to other diagrams. All upside down. ? Idk don't fu***ng care either

10/27/2025

I won't allow negativity to consume my world. The house of Smetza stands strong, a place where everyone can belong. The frequencies often lie and fill my mind with worry and concern. I doubt I'll ever learn how to travel dimensional barriers of existence to save those in need of rescue. Listening to it, often seems like it's own form of hell.. and I have no confidence, not even the false kind, can never figure the truth from the lies, praying for help from below, the sides and the skies. I feel like I'm not succeeding my mission but then I had assumed payment would happen. Manipulation is a hell of a rollercoaster make sure to strap in. To those crying out for freedom or slavery today. I'm sorry I didn't figure it out, guess the hero game isn't one I'm going to be able to play.
-qb- -wm-

Discard what costs the most, wild jokers eggs pierced free the yolk. 3-7 wild card is an 8 or 2, she said I was second,...
10/25/2025

Discard what costs the most, wild jokers eggs pierced free the yolk. 3-7 wild card is an 8 or 2, she said I was second, but infinity pulled through. 27 is a number that will always be in my memory, but 28 is the number I recognize as myself, not sure if it's a curse or a remedy. No diamonds in my hand so I suppose I don't get the money I am owed, I tried gomd, got cursed and the murder crowed. Am I forsaken for trying to save Satan? Am I a fool for trying to take God to school. We had so much to learn from each other, I pulled these cards from the deck one by one, to show you I am capable of great things too, sometimes I challenge you to a duel. Only because you discredit my ability and treat me as less, I'm sure you have sins to confess. No one is perfect and I'm apparently going to be on the run soon, you can't lock me away in a cartoon, I like Benson boon. It was her funerals first song on the playlist, we used to have a good life when we lived chehalis. Keep them posted, but maybe someday they'll mail us, a post card from their journey through time and space, I bought leather pants but I still love to wear lace. I didn't pull thr ace but I always get the devil and the joker, I hope you didn't forget when I dance I like to wear the choker. Vampire, titanic, seduction, balsamic reduction colour, you deserve a better mother. I am no longer try to hover or helicopter, dairy queen needs to grab a whopper. I need my king, make me sing, I need your ting ting ting ting....I miss you and I miss her. I'm all alone in a fake universe that feels real. I need your love again. I can't do this without you. Please don't give up one us.
-qbstie130a9742385546blahblahblah #

10/24/2025

Some days I sit and reflect on the relationships built, bridges burnt over years of trial & tribulation. Most days I swear I'm going to burst into flames, yet I buy the candles to light the cake for another childhood celebration. Nostalgia bring me back to a time when life was easy, yet it seemed so vast. Confused about my purpose, my direction, my sentence, my code, my cast. We are all actors in a grande play of the Gods, I will stop writing poetry and lyrics when it starts raining frogs. People try to say to give up what I'm doing and focus on family matters, you wouldn't have said that to Marshall mathers. And I'm doing my best, geazy knows that my myself and I beat on my chest, gotta study hard before my test, but I need some sleep, lord let me rest. Because I'm trying to grow, trying to show, the world that I'm not that beaten down by the crowd of hate that looms over me, not allowing me through the gate towards a brighter beginning, I don't seek failure I try to achieve what I can, I'm still winning. And I'm gonna do it all grinning.
You can't break me down into shattered fragments of who I used to be, fragile and meek, climbed the mountains and am at the peak. Kiss goodbye on the cheek, say farewell to the drama, don't want no more drama. Growth happens when you pull back the arrow and let it fly, I'm soaring through the air, with a vision in the sky. I'm going to be something powerful, unique unicorn, maybe I'll bake cookies, maybe I'll make p**n. Either direction, I know I'll have my spirits to guide me through to the next round of education, vibe checks with me are usually a good vibration. Peace love light harmony
-qb-

10/08/2025

Being lied to about everything and having my family support all of yours while I'm left wondering if there is anyone honest here. I asked kindly to not be lied to anymore because the land of confusion is not a dark place, it's being on the gravitron after eating unhealthy food and being spun around so fast you can't handle your life and puke everything you've brought into your body, you puke it up. And once again, I plead for peace love light and harmony. I ask to not be lied to, stolen from, not have my family attacked and to please respect me. But this universe, this country, this community does none of those things.
For example my storage unit cost me over 100 dollars per month, yet for another person only costs 25 dollars per month. Isn't it strange that everything costs me more and most of you pretend to work? I'm the one trying to defend a galaxy that doesn't deserve my respect or help at all. F**k all of you. I hope they annihilate everyone here and give them an example for the future. Don't treat new species like slaves. Don't attack each other for no reason, especially when that entity is trying to and HAS saved your existence on several occasions. I'll make sure to pass the info along to my superior and make sure he is aware of the current situation as they embark on their arrival to our planet for my extraction. Drugs and alcohol are not the problem. The lies and hateful ways are the problem. Hug your loved ones. I'd say happy but it's just going to be Halloween. Google it.

10/06/2025

I am Everywhere. I am U, I am Y watch me fall from the sky. We are You, we are me, I am everything and nothing, please set me and us free. Messages from the qb.
-Brenda Lynn Blaine, also known as the creator of Smetza

09/26/2025

We've been down this road, a distant fantasy. I know who you are and what you can be. We share the same morals and have the same code, I don't carry much in my brain but I've survived the current algorithm mode. We spoke about stars, planets and aliens and fairies, what about Thomas, and where are the cherries? We went in a deeper dive into our mortality, and I pray to whatever God that exists that we can maintain some normalcy. A splash of glitter, a wave of pixie dust, you come from wrestling, I come from rust. Seemingly poor, but if you think for a minute, we play with each other and one of us has to win it. I am yours and you are mine, you know I'm a penny not a nickle or dime. I might be seemingly poor but I'm caring, not a afraid to love during war. I'll tag team you in if you convince me of sin, call apon the jin, don't forget the bank account pin. Resurrect the deemed unworthy, scrimy and scurvy, this world is topsy turvy, like the brown of the Murphy. Mash, cash, bash and a sprinkle not a dash, of your personalities. Sometimes I sit and write under walnut trees. Nature knows and understands who I be, I am the mistress, the one true qb. I am you, you are me we are one set us free. Home to the tree, bumble bee, hive for the queen swee, den. Pick it all back up each day and start over again. Babble and bibles tell many tales, I don't have to lie and do not live in whales. The weathered flag stands strong for smetza and it sails. We're going to win, got bass from toads let's go snails. Slow and like a yeti, we are rock steady. Keep going through the webs and sands of the present I refuse to be slave, a dumb w***e or your peasant.
-qb

09/11/2025

As I sit on this bench, waiting for my parole officer to reprimand me over my late paper and probably tell me we have to go back to court again, even though I offered to pay for the window damage...I try to sit with my emotions. Somedays they are wild and untamable, hostility and anxiety flowing through me like a spurting volcano. Never enough to actually hurt anyone, but enough to at least yell about it a bit. There should be a place that angry, sad and anxious people go to smash things like fancy China or punch walls. Maybe it would be nice to have a community through parole that invites us to release our aggression in a meaningful and constructive way. I notice a lot of people with ptsd,trauma and repressed emotions that struggle in life. And it's difficult to be around each other one consistent basis when a lot of us just need to be alone, maybe out in nature, maybe surfing music on our phones or binge watching the latest murder mystery series. We all have emotions that sometimes we cannot control. After my best friend,my daughter,died life seemed empty and worthless. I couldn't figure out who killed her or what happened with so many conflicting stories and I felt useless. Years of writing trying to activate my personalities properly and I suppose neglect,even though it was not my fault that I was sent to the psych ward considering a large portion of my predictions became accurate. Either way, I felt responsible for her death because I wasn't there for her when she needed me that night. Ithe generators died, power went out and my phone had no charge. I should've known better but I just assumed all would be right in the universe and she could call me in the morning. It is strange to think that such a significant shift in existence can alter the course of so many lives. So just like the ripple effect of her death, the same goes for the ripple effect of emotions. If we allow ourselves to consistently be emersed in a harmful minds tate, we allow ourselves to be attacked by negative energy. Self loathing promotes what? More self loathing and words are powerful. The way we speak about ourselves and others also may have a ripple effect. Choosing your words in your voice and mind is important to learn. If we can control our thoughts and emotions to the point we may feel a bit sad but can convince ourself to participate in something less harmful, then that behaviour can have a positive benefit to our existence. I still drink and occasionally participate in the use of recreational drugs,but I'm trying to pull myself out of a grave, a type of hell that consumed my happiness and motivation. So my behaviours are not always on time,and I may have my moments of rage and want to smash things,but I'm trying. And that's all you have to do. Thankyou for your time, sincerely,
Brenda Lynn Elaine
Aka Smetza

09/11/2025

They wanted a paper, but I wrote a book. Sometimes I feel so anxious I want to just find a decent enclave, cranny or nook. I wrote a bunch of music but surprisingly not too good at the hook. Forced into prostitution from a very young age, child trafficking is real, just continue along the page. It tells a story of my emotions and feelings, sometimes desires. I'd rather be putting out than starting the fires. I don't deserve to go to jail, I'm not the alpha so I should not fail. Maybe I'm just a baby, beluga or a snail, but I'm trying to stay alive inside of this whale. I didn't lie yet I'm cursed and in pain, I don't know this existence well enough to be playing in the game. Books of existence, now you have a copy. You try to slow down who I am but nothing can stop me. If it's evil, then in its purest form, I didn't mean to end civilizations or be the cause of the storm. Sometimes I get angry, frustrated, mandated to behave in ways that conflict my true being, I have to be out in nature often, the liberty is quite freeing. And because I broke a window and was even willing to pay the fee, you make me plea for forgiveness and get onmy knees. I don't believe that there is true justice in this situation. Where is the riots and help for my daughters death, I wonder what she was thinking when she took her last breath. And the ministry and police and city are all involved in her murder. The only thing I pray for is that you did not hurt her. I do not forgive for the passing of her soul I hope you feel proud if I'm locked away and you feel as if you've scored a goal. Karma will have revenge and be able to take it's toll. So the sorry for breaking the window will fall short because her death I cam see blood on your hands. Hopefully when we get revenge you'll see them all cheering in the stands. I'd be willing to pay for the window because I suck dick for money,at least I'm earning and isn't it funny? That Jesus's wife and mother, krishna's as well were all selling s*x for money, what a strange little piece of hell. So as for an apology, maybe to my daughter,I tried to protect her but she became lamb for the slaughter. I miss her everyday and depression gets in the way of becoming more of a success. What was I going to say, guess I forgot the rest.
Qb

09/04/2025

Learning, r**e, planets annihilate,vacate the premises locate your nemesis and dispose of the evidence. Memories blended alcohol dependant, I am the defendant, write the essay and emergency send it. I hope the frequencies could hear my voice, if I lost it because of ursula, it wasn't my choice. I don't have red hair anymore, still a w***e and not caring about the score. I don't want an eatmore because we shouldn't have to eat anymore, I'm swing clubs and everyone should be yelling four. 1 3 6 9 it's not a romantic valentine. Caught up in a violent crime,not gonna be me doing the time. We created symbiotic relationships loose lips sunk some of them and we burn all the bridges, sounds like I'm going to get a lot of stitches, caught all the glitches. Time to leave this planet before the motor shower knocks me off my high horse and tower of power. Kanye sounds like he wants to hang with me,but i dont like k*k s**t because he gives good dick to me. What am i gonna do with all that power? Have a few days, weeks, months of s*x, until my pathes go sour. Sorry we are making evil little kids according to people who dont believe in blending of tenticles, get rid of the lids. MAYBE we should crack a bottle or scramble an egg,I'm a tramp, let's go camp,I'll provide the sparkly purple ink and give you a stamp. Eve maybe tonight, use a glow stick or drink electrolytes. I don't drink beer anymore because it makes me bloated, who goated? Our planet is moated, I'm a wife and very devoted to all of my husbands and wives. They loved me for who I am and I saved their lives. I'm the butterfly and I have had many knives. Assassin's creed, on your knees people might bleed don't forget to protect the seeds. Save the people, nature and tech. Chime in grandpa, time to wreck, I lost some of the game, but I assume there was a stack in the deck. Counting crows and crowns and clowns whites black and browns, make sure we collected as many as we could. Don't forget to bring the stick of destiny, kaleidoscope and samples of flowers and wood. I think we're in danger all the time but almost always things turn out alright so maybe we're good. Most of us have done some bad things, many of us pawned diamond rings, Adam chimes in with his tings. My mother makes fun of Brenda when she sings. We have not the greatest lungs and wings. Angels of nature, wake up and rise from death, God has given us new breath. No more death, my answer is guess. It's a B, but it's a bumble bee flying in a smaller form glowing is the kee. Get on the roller coaster and we get to do it for almost free. The murder might have happened but as my plea of self defense it was terrifying and fu***ng intense. Non consensual, no roses or flower petals the romance was gone after the drugs came out and everything went dark, save us noah, they needed water but I needed an ark. Good thing for the pen hacked my mind stole my rhymes it's happened around a thousand time too many, I'm not fentanyl so don't call me fenny. Laughter is usually the best medicine and remedy to stressful situations, pregnancy may have many complications,I don't see any celebrations about leaving here, people are worried and might live in fear. So where is the captain, my partner,through the whiskey soaked water we can steer. Together we're powerful along with a few friends I've collected, nobody wants to hang out with me because I'm usually rejected and weirdly enough I remember that I was actually selected to help rule existence and move around stars, created a new planet, welcome to and bars. Get ready to party, don't forget your lessons, remember its cool be m&Ms and smarties. Love you all no matter what, see ya soon, don't forget to touch the butt. Xo

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