Around Seattle in 80 Dates

04/12/2026

Forget the 5-star restaurant. Want to know what’s actually sexy? 😌

I just experienced something that reminded me why real connection beats a "perfect" date every single time. A man who sees what needs to be done in your sanctuary, your home, and picks up a tool to help you fix and organize it.

I’m telling you: watching a man handle a "to-do" list is better than a candlelit dinner!

In my book, Around Seattle in 80 Dates, I talk a lot about the search for connection. But lately, I’ve realized something deeper. When a man helps you organize your space, it isn't just about a leaky faucet or a crooked shelf.
It’s about Acts of Service. It’s seeing his physical competence.

• It’s the intimacy of working side-by-side in your private space.
• It’s the incredible feeling of knowing, "He has my back."

There is no better way to move through life than with someone who wants to make your path smoother. When we take care of each other’s environments, we are creating a more meaningful, happy life.

To the men: You don't need a fancy reservation to impress a woman. Your competence, your willingness to help, and your care for her "sanctuary" is the ultimate aphrodisiac. We see you, and we appreciate it more than you know.

To the women: Am I alone here? Or is a man with a screwdriver officially sexier than a man with a tuxedo?

P.S. To the one who spent time in my sanctuary this week: Thank you for having my back. You made "moving through life" feel a whole lot lighter.

04/02/2026

Stop Apologizing for Your Identity.

I saw a post from a woman in her 30s who was exhausted. Every date she went on turned into a trial. Because she is Jewish and Israeli, men felt entitled to "critique" her beliefs before the appetizers even arrived.

I’m experiencing the exact same thing. In my book, Around Seattle in 80 Dates, I explore the messy, beautiful, and often frustrating world of connection. Here is the hard truth: You cannot find the right people if you are hiding who you are to avoid the wrong ones.
I choose to be loud about being Jewish and Israeli on my profile. I don't see it as a "barrier" - I see it as a filter.

We have a massive problem today where people are disconnected and afraid to be authentic. If you want a meaningful, happy life, you have to stop wasting time on people who require you to shrink. My business, ZUZLA, is about moving—moving your body and moving toward a life that fits you. That starts with standing your ground before the first date even starts.
The Critique: Most people’s "weakness" in dating is being a people-pleaser. You think you’re being "open-minded," but you’re actually being "boundary-less." Put the "controversial" truth in your bio. Let the wrong ones swipe left so the right ones can find you.
What is your "Day 1" dealbreaker that you’re finally ready to be honest about?

02/28/2026

He wrote this after just a few nice messages about cooking and traveling:

“I am looking for my best friend and my one and only best lover… a woman who wants to commit to a life with me…”

We have never met. Never talked.

Question for you:
Is this romantic… or too much too soon?

When someone jumps straight to “one and only” and “commit to life” before even meeting … how do you respond?

Do you:
A. Feel flattered
B. Feel pressured
C. Think it’s love-bombing
D. Think he’s just being clear about intentions

I’ll share what I answered in the first comment 👇

02/18/2026

The Spark-to-Burn Progression

Can we stop acting like "The Spark" and "The Slow Burn" are rivals? 🥊

In my experience, they’re actually partners. The Spark is the mandatory entry fee; it’s that "I definitely want to see you again" feeling that gets you to the second and third date. Without it, you’re just making polite conversation with a stranger.

But the Slow Burn is where the magic happens. It’s when that initial interest actually gains momentum, gets stronger, and grows into something exclusive. 📈✨

If you don’t have the spark, you never get to the burn. And if you don't have the burn, you just have a firework that fizzles out by Tuesday.

I’m curious—do you think the "Spark" is a mandatory requirement for a second date, or are you willing to wait for the "Slow Burn" to start from scratch? 👇

Whag are your thoughts?
https://www.facebook.com/share/r/1Avk9eATX3/?mibextid=wwXIfr

02/14/2026

Happy Valentine’s Day 😏

Single? Stay home. Avoid the $48 pasta and the crowded tables. Light a candle, order what you actually like, and enjoy the peace. Luxury.

Dating? Remember, they’re not here to complete you. They’re here to upgrade an already solid system.

Love is great. Discounts and self respect are greater. 😉

This Valentine’s Day, remember: Love should add to your life, not define it. The right person won’t complete you, they’ll complement the incredible life you’...

02/13/2026

Touchy Tom and the Disappearing Act

I went on a date with Touchy Tom.
Nice guy. Good conversation. Decent shoes.

But… his hands were applying for a full time position way too early.

I said calmly, “Hey, slow down.”
He backed off and instantly switched to the “injured gentleman” role. Fascinating transformation. Oscar worthy.

Next day?
Silence.

No mention of the show I invited him to.
No “I had a great time.”
No follow up.

So here’s today’s dating tip:
If a man touches too fast and then disappears when you set a boundary, do not send a “Good morning 😊”

Silence is data.

If he’s interested, he will step forward.
If he fades, he saved you time.

Conclusion:
Do not chase Touchy Tom.
Let him become Ghostly Posty all by himself.

02/01/2026

Exhibit A of why dating is so draining lately. 🤦‍♀️

I tried to pivot the conversation toward something real, and he doubled down on his portfolio. It’s disappointing that so many men think women are just "input/output" machines where you insert a villa and receive interest.
Question for the group: Why is it so hard to find a man who can hold a deep conversation without checking his net worth first? Let’s talk about it in the comments. 👇

01/31/2026

Dating after 55 is not about lowering standards.
It’s about raising awareness.

Chemistry is fun, but consistency is sexy.
Daily texts mean nothing if actions don’t match.
You’re not here to fix, rescue, or heal anyone.
You’re here to enjoy, connect, and feel calm.

At this stage of life, the real green flags are kindness, emotional stability, curiosity, and respect for boundaries.

Dating should add joy to your already full life, not drain it.

If you’re dating over 55 and want less drama and more clarity, you’re in the right place.
Tell me, what’s one thing you no longer tolerate in dating? My answer is in the first comment. 

01/30/2026

Bingo!

01/14/2026

As the author of a book about online dating I thought that I know so much, but still, life keeps teaching me new things.
Recently I listened to a podcast that gave me a real “wait… what?!”. Turns out only about 5% of men get messages or a swipe right from women. Yes, five. Not fifty.
Which means 95% of men are sitting in the app wondering if their email is broken, and the 5% who do get a yes are drowning in chats.

So I said to myself, fine, scientific experiment time. I decided to go out with men who, based on their photos or profiles, I probably wouldn’t be dancing around the living room about. No fireworks, no “oh wow!”. Just curiosity.
And honestly? In the last week I had two really good dates, and one of them already turned into a second date. I have no idea where this will go, if anywhere at all, but after a long time of frustration, deleting apps, and leaving the market, I actually enjoyed myself. Yes, enjoyed. Weird, right?

So my message to you is this: don’t give up, don’t take it personally. It’s not you. It’s the algorithm, the fears, and everyone’s emotional baggage.
A lot of people had bad experiences and they project them forward. Sometimes it lands on us, and that’s just not fair.

I just wanted to say, you’re really not alone. So before you delete the app, smash your phone, and move on to raising cats… maybe it’s worth one more small experiment 😄

The picture is from today… we laughed so much! HE started to laugh with tears!

01/07/2026

When the chat is fun, the meeting is easy, the conversation flows, and the wine is just a bonus. I was very close to losing hope that fun first dates still exist… and then this gentleman showed up and reminded me that hope should never be deleted !!!

01/07/2026

Three-minute video call.
Yes, he’s real.
Still… way too much.

Right after, I get a full romance monologue about kissing me, holding me, listening to my heartbeat.
Sir.
We’ve known each other for three minutes.

This isn’t romance, it’s rushing intimacy without connection.
AI-written or not, the issue is the same: zero pacing, zero awareness.

Dating tip of the day:
Chemistry builds.
Comfort comes first.
Respect is always attractive.