07/29/2026
Resilience isnāt about committing to suffering , itās about committing to living.
I just saw this poem by James A. Pearson āCome home to this body. Itās living your lifeā. And I had to stop painting and make a post. Today is the first day in almost 2 years Iāve had the energy and vitality for a full studio day in which most of it has been spent standing, moving, painting, joking , laughing, and sharing. I truly feel like the mold in my apartment was slowly taking me under and then this summer in the humidity my symptoms sped up. To come home to my body, to be able to paint and create and prep all day to make work, to express with my body, it feels like a miracle. Iām sitting here in tears because I have been living with cognitive fog from the mold for so long and I didnāt know why and here I am, able to create without needing a nap, without needing extra meds, without an inhaler ⦠thank you for this poem James. Itās time to live my life again.
This is me all red faced in the hot studio . I feel so happy right now typing this, even though Iām full of sweat and funk lol š. The hot summers in a studio, itās an artist right of passage. All Iāve wanted it a little bit of suffering for the right reasons haha; not cognitive fog š«ļø. Iāve made appointments today to to see an allergist and dermatologist . I will also be getting an MRI soon. I have tapped the shoulder of my medical team and said hey itās go time for me to truly heal now. Letās get my skin healed, my brain, my lungs , anything we can do. Iām also researching the right diet to try , exercises , meditations , teas and more, I know whatās been making me sick, we are killing the mold and Iām going to rebuild my life, my business, and my creative life.
I have been busting my š to get stuff moving. First up will be commissions Iāve owed people forever due to illness and painted postcards. I have a teen student Iāve been mentoring for years. This summer in exchange for studio time and a few other things , heās been my assistant for a few hours a month. He helped me gesso a bit today and we went over oil priming and other stuff. He worked hard! He then worked on his mini paintings that heās opening a store f