CDE Poetry

04/27/2025

Aching.
Beautiful.
Filthy-mouthed.
Holden.
Caroline.
Half God, half gutter.
Full heart, full teeth.
Still bleeding. Still singing. -CDE

04/27/2025

04/13/2025

the soul i saw
(a poem for when love stays too long)

i saw his soul.
not the performance, not the posture.
the raw thing.
the place where his sadness touched mine.

and you don’t unsee that.
you don’t unlove that.
even when his human
shut the door mid-sentence.

he was the one
i thought wouldn’t do this.
and for a while,
he wasn’t.

but then
he did.

and now i’m stuck
with this tenderness
that has no place to go.

it’s not weakness.
it’s not relapse.
it’s just
the cruel math
of deep love
plus deep harm.

i hate that my body flinches
and still aches toward
what cut it open.

but this is the part
where i stay soft
without staying silent.

this is the part
where i feel everything
and still
walk away.-CDE

01/31/2025

That’s the hardest part, isn’t it? Letting yourself feel it all without resistance. Letting the heartbreak do what it needs to do.
To crack you open, teach you, and make space for whatever comes next.
You don’t have to rush to make sense of it. You don’t have to turn it into something neat and digestible. Just feel it. Let the sorrow move through you like a tide, knowing it won’t drown you, only reshape the shoreline of who you are.

12/28/2024

I kissed the mirror,
weeping out apologies
to the woman who stayed
when she should have run,
to the girl who gave too much
and called it love.

12/13/2024

Do poets even say hello? How about "a whisper of possibility, the first word of everything and nothing."

12/13/2024

in silence
love fatigues
unshaped pain forgets to breathe
I write poems
so the air fills
me -CDE

12/10/2024

This Time,
i screamed at God.
how many times
could i bleed for a man
who wouldn’t stop cutting me?
how much of myself
did i have to give
before there was nothing left?

but God answered.
not with a call to stay,
but with a command to rise.
"you are not his savior,"
He said.
"I am yours,
and you are mine."

This Time,
I listened.-CDE