Leaving Contempt: The Evolution Of Me

Contempt came about as a sort of alter ego, although she was with me long before she was given a name. By the time I had named her not only was she well and truly here but I relied on her for excitement in my life and knowingly let her have control. To take actions and make decisions I would never normally make. Deceptive, manipulative and lacks compassion and empathy. She is the part of me that t

hinks, says and does things I am ashamed of and regret later. Present frequently towards the end of my 18 year relationship, Contempt caused me not only pain, heartache and shame, but also made me brave and more confident in who I really was and what I wanted. I used to think it was that part of who I was that caused the marriage breakdown. That this must be who I am. But she helped me realise I was NOT completely Contempt but neither was I the person I had become. I had lost my Lou. The writing and photography contained here all comes from the years spent finding my Lou, up to the present day. It was a way to understand and release my thoughts and feelings. A form of therapy and self-discovery. I believe we all have a part of Contempt within us. Capable of nasty and immoral behavior. A Dark Side. It’s up to you to decide how much influence you allow it to have on who you are and strive to be. Without the Darkness, there can be no Light. P.s. others peoples’ words that particularly spoke to me during this time have been given credit, where possible. Lou.