16/07/2026
This isn’t done yet, but I felt I needed a bit of feedback to use as motivation, so that I can finish this up.
I started working on this piece while reading the book ‘Ego is the enemy’ by Ryan Holiday. How do these two connect, you ask.
In K-Pop Demon Hunters, Rumi is born half demon. But her mom-like Celine couldn’t accept it. She told Rumi that her demon patterns are something to be hidden, to be fixed. And Rumi, being an innocent child, believes it, and does everything in her power to never show it to anyone, not even her closest friends. Until the fateful day where her patterns are revealed to the whole world. She runs back to Celine and asks her to kill her, because she’s failed, she finally accepts that she is a demon, and deserves to die. But Celine couldn’t do it. Because part of her loves Rumi, the human part, but detests the demon part. This pose is from the pivotal scene when Rumi asks Celine directly, ‘why can’t you look at me’, ‘why can’t you love me, all of me’.
It just made me realise that when we try to seek validation from another person who struggles to accept you as you are, you fawn for them. You internalise their beliefs, you start seeing yourself through their eyes, and you start hating yourself. You become the demon they think that you are. Because all the while that you go to them and ask them to love you, ask them to accept you, you’re the one who looks pathetic and demonic. It brings out the worst in us because we hate being rejected.
The only way out of this is stop looking for love where it can’t be found. And that’s what Rumi does, she disappears and rejects the perfect golden honmoon that she was promised would ‘fix’ everything.
The ego asks to be validated, to be appeased. Ego is the enemy.
I know this isn’t usual for me post deep philosophical pieces, but I’d like to experiment and find my voice. Tag along for the journey, and let me know your thoughts 💭
(Fan art, kpop demon hunters, Rumi, ego validation, rejection, colour pencils, portraits)
